The status quo should change

A few months ago when I still lived in Provo, my cousin who was engaged at the time, set me up on a date with his fiance's former mission companion. If you are a guy reading this, I know what you're thinking: there are many red flags in that previous sentence. I was skeptical myself, but I figured that I had never really interacted with my cousin and his fiance in a social setting before (they got engaged really quickly), so I decided to go out with them. I was shocked when I first saw my blind-date that she was beautiful, not what I expected in all honesty. According to the dating rules, you can't come across as too interested in your date or else she'll think that you're some creepy guy. I've learned that this rule especially applies to women who are really good-looking. So I was just trying to be myself the whole night, but at the same time maintaining a bubble that I deemed appropriate for her. She seemed a little bit quiet to me, and at the time I interpreted her actions as being standoffish. I respected that, for there's no point in acting interested if you are not. The whole night was fun for me as I got to see my cousin as previously explained. But my date and I never seemed to attain that level of connection that warrants a second date. To put my case in point, towards the end of the date I didn't even feel like walking her to the door and doing the whole door-step scene. But I did anyway and gave her a hug, but didn't get her number. On the way home, I thought to myself that there was a girl who had her heart elsewhere and that maybe a guy was on her mind somewhere else, because she didn't seem to be giving it up to me. The next week I was over at my cousin's house just chillin' and guess who shows up? That same girl whose name will be anonymous for now. It seemed to me that she came to visit Brooke that Sunday evening. I stayed for only a few minutes and briefly chatted with her, but then left shortly thereafter. I never really kept in touch with this date of mine. Just last week, as I visited Utah, I talked with Brooke about this girl whom she set me up with many months back. She asked me what I thought about her. I told her what I honestly felt at the time, that I was getting uninterested vibes from her. Brooke countered that she was shy and that she liked me. I was shocked at that comment and skeptical. She furthered that that one Sunday, she came to visit Brooke at my cousin's to visit me. That was very unexpected. She then went on to explain how good of a companion on her mission she was. After that, I started thinking about the limitations of dating. First dates (especially blind-first dates) are lame in that in essence the two participating parties judge the other person on the basis of very superficial and in many cases short-term elements. The basis of this is that we are naturally superficial people at first. After time, the important issues surface. This has its advantages, but one big disadvantage is that if two people are not on the same page as each other in very trivial matters (as was the case with me and this girl that night) I never get the chance to see if we are on the same page in long-lasting and important matters. I think dating needs to make a change if it's gonna be any more effective at putting more people into relationships. Instead of focusing on the petty details, which people could easily work out with more time together, what if more of a focus was on the important issues? For instance, if the whole time the only topics of conversation is on music, fashion, and movies, it's difficult for me to comprehend how valuable information about the other person was gleaned other than physical attraction. There seems to be another option on the web. Internet dating seems to be picking up steam. I don't know if this is the solution. Despite the number of deep questions that you can ask someone online, it is always different than asking them in person. That way the the questionee can see the questioner's face and gauge his or her sincerity. Alas, I'm idealizing again. Shoot.