The Behemoth Stirs

It was particularly dark in the forest. A settled, hazy fog penetrated everything with a damp and chilling cold. The Behemoth was fully within the fog's grasp. For months it had lain cold and dead.

As the dawn approached, something different was in the air. Sunlight cut through the trees and fog like a sharp knife cuts through flesh. A new life. The forest was not accustomed to it. It had been so long. The beast was in plain view now. Debris, which had long encumbered the lifeless, massive frame, had all but melted away. Now there was breathing. Up and down, the breathing became deeper, more rhythmic, returning the creature to full life.

The surroundings seemed the same as before, but something was definitely different. Suddenly, in an unexpected moment the Behemoth's eye flashed open. After looking around momentarily, the beast began to recognize familiarity.

My Adventure is Over

After three weeks in Utah, I am back. As I sit in my room, I am wondering if my Utah trip could have been any better. The resounding answer is no. My trip deserves a perfect score of 10. Here's what made it so good:
Spending an inordinate amount of time with family. I love my family so much. I couldn't get enough of them! You see, last year I spent Christmas in Boston because I was too poor to fly home. After that experience, I no longer take for granted time with them. On Christmas eve, Jennica and I went to the tree lot to get ourselves a tree. Not contented with an average size tree, Jennica picked out a beast of a tree. We managed to somehow fit it in the trunk of the rather small Sebring convertible. We did not decorate the tree all fancy and cute afterwards, but most importantly, we got a real tree for only $9. With the whole family together, we discussed business ideas and other ways of earning money. It's something our family has done ever since I can remember. Our family played Acquire twice. I am not very good at that game, yet. However, I did beat anyone who opposed me in Othello and Chess. Lots of my relatives have new places of residence. I saw 5: Kristen and Erik's, Brooke and Stan's, Haley and Graden's, Lisa and Graden's, and Aunt Lark and Uncle Dennis. They all look really nice, especially Graden's. I got to know my brothers' wives a lot more over the break and I love them. They are great additions to the Ostler family.
Snowboarding in fresh powder. Mother nature has already smiled down upon Utah's slopes this winter. Few feelings in the world are better than carving down a freshly powdered mountain.
Weightlifting in good company. Scott, Nate and I started our "march-to-March" regimen. The goal is to work out so that when March comes around, and it's warm enough to take off your shirt, we can do so without shame. In fact, all eyes will be on us.
Spending quality time with old friends. Ray and I discussed website ideas over lunch. Rich and I watched the funniest Russian film together. Renny and I made caramel popcorn and watched Boston Legal.
Spending lots of time with SK. From holiday festivities to swing dancing in Sandy to the Harold B. Lee, I was glad I got to know SK better than I ever have.
No car problems. I drove the Sebring for three weeks. The tires were very much bald and the left headlight was out. I had a couple moments when I truly thought I would get in a wreck. One time, while approaching a red light at a more rapid-than-is-safe rate, I braked, slid, pumped the brakes, kept on sliding, then slammed on the brakes until I stopped 6 inches behind the car in front of us.
Working on personal website stuff. This involved working at the BYU library and also working from home late at night. In fact, on Thursday I found myself up until 5AM coding, which reminded me of my college days.
Meeting Lady Schwarz. The last night I was there, Ray set me up with his cousin. It turned out to be super FUN with her. I will need patience, however, as our geographic disparity is 2,343 miles.

In short, Utah is a great place. I've always been the type of kid who was totally "over" living in Utah, but my trip reminded me how cool Utah is. Now that I'm back East, I will enjoy sleeping in a large and spacious bed. I also need motivation for an even more difficult semester.

An Ode to Law School

Yesterday was the end of my first semester as a 1L. I was expecting a huge feeling of relief after handing in my last final exam, but strangely enough, that did not happen. Instead, anxious thoughts about grades swirled through my mind. Here are some thoughts of what made this semester so memorable.

When I first started the semester, I had a strange preconception that I was going to excel above all the other students in my class. I figured that because I had no distractions, I could spend all my waking time on school. I discovered, less than a couple weeks in, that spending all my time with school is necessary just to keep afloat. Each of my five classes required me to read and write more than I ever had before. Also, it seemed like everyone around me was as smart or smarter than me. Plus, every guest lecturer or student adviser stressed the importance of getting superb grades. It was around this time that I felt overwhelmed, freaked out and depressed about law school. I later found out that 1Ls tend to have these moments.

However, I felt confident that if I kept working hard, I could do well. For motivation, I went online and bought a poster to get me riled up. Every day I would come home to this poster. If the text is too small, it reads: 21st May 1965, Muhammad Ali vs. Sonny Liston, First Minute - First Round. Sometimes I felt like the man on the mat, but most of the time I pictured myself as Muhammad Ali.

I was not completely anti-social, but close. Thinking back throughout my life, I realized that without distractions I tend to close myself up and study. I got really good grades in high school, because I was basically not into the high school social scene. I didn’t get good grades in college because I liked hanging out with friends. In Boston, I was supposed to study for the LSAT all summer long and do amazing on it. Then I made great friends who helped me unfocus myself from my studies. Then I came to law school and without any relatives or close friends, found school to be my outlet for spending time.

I found out something very interesting about my sleep patterns. When I spend a lot of time exercising my mental faculties (studying), I don’t need very much sleep. Especially when working on specific assignments, I found I need no more than 7 hours of sleep. Getting by on less sleep was crucial over the course of the past four months.

I learned that writing is an art. I love it, love it, love it. Writing as a lawyer is so logical, once you know how to do it, and it’s FUN.

As fun as it was to become all competitive with fellow students, I learned that getting good grades isn’t of sole importance. Actually, it may be, but I am not going to incessantly fret about grades. My motto has become this: work hard and in theory you will get what you deserve.

Franklin Pierce Law Center did not let me down. The facilities were good. The fellow students were very friendly, helpful, and smart. For the most part, my professors were great, knowledgeable, and friendly. Civil Procedure was awesome. Professor Budd, Harvard Law alum and former head of the ACLU in California, taught like a champ. Contracts was cool. Johnny O was cool. I liked his conservative approach and his lectures were very interesting and funny. Torts was not too fun.

The Reality of the Girl's Network

It has come to my attention that many either do not know of the girls' network, or deny that it exists. Often times it comes as a surprise to boys how quickly information about themselves spreads. No one should be surprised once the girls' network is truly understood.

The girls' network is vast. It transcends national borders. Oceans cannot limit its sphere of influence. The girl's network does not have beginning of days nor end of life. It is beyond comprehension and defies understanding. What is said to one, may very well be said to many.

The girls' network is a powerful and effective means of gathering information. Most of the time spent on the girls' network is discussing boys. The girls' network shows that girls are much more adept at compiling and transferring relevant information at all levels of complexity. At the most fundamental level, they've got the face-to-face girl-talk down. Whether the group is small or large, girls have an innate capability for asking the right questions, and answering with enough information to very quickly gather and disseminate lots of information in a short period of time.

Technology has only fueled the network. Standard forms of technology, such as cellphones, email, SMS, and IMing, allow for the girl's grapevine to more quickly gather and spread information. Then there are the more advanced technological resources found on the Internet: Facebook, Myspace, blogs, Twitter, etc. Through the Internet, masses of information go into the public domain so that any girl with a web browser can harvest the relevant information and insert it directly into the network. In fact, assuming that girls and boys use technological resources equally, in a way I don't quite fully comprehend, girls seem to utilize them better than their counterparts to promote the network's ends.

It is true that not every female is an active participant to the girls' network, but this does not diminish the validity of the network. No other network comes close to being as efficient or robust. While I fully acknowledge there are exceptions, I also make the argument that many girls who are not active participants to the girls' network would participate if given the chance. Some girls feel like they do not participate in the girl's network because they limit their information-divulging to select individuals who "do not spread it." This is often times false, and may be how the girl's network is so effective. All it takes is one girl, and the rest is history.

I feel like a piano key right now

Before I begin, let me reassure you that I love life very much. This past week has been hard on me, though, as I have become acutely aware of my inadequacies and limitations. The worst part is that I have felt quite powerless against my weaknesses. In Notes from Underground, the underground man perfectly explains how I feel: "then, you say, science itself will teach man that in fact he has neither will nor caprice, and never did have any, and that he himself is nothing but a sort of piano key or a sprig in an organ; and that, furthermore, there also exist in the world the laws of nature; so that whatever he does is done not at all according to his own wanting, but of itself, according to the laws of nature." The underground man later questions if mankind really has free will. He uses the example of someone playing the piano. That piano player may say that he is pressing a key with his right hand because he wants to, and that he can play it with his left hand if he really wanted to, but there is actually another factor that goes into his decision-making besides his own free will. This upstream reason exists whether he knows it or not. In fact, if he thinks he is in control, he is stupid. This analysis is exactly how I feel with life at the moment. I feel like I may think that I can choose, and live my life according to plan, but I am actually not making any decisions. I am at the mercy of my motivations, my mood, and chemicals in my body. I feel like I am a piano who is very much at the mercy of other factors to play me.

However, I am almost 100% sure that my "underground man" feelings are only temporary. It is not true that we have no control over our circumstances. Each of us has ups and downs (I am in a down moment in case you can't tell), and we may doubt our free will at times, but we have power to rise above ourselves. In addition to our bodies, each of us has a spirit. This distinction sets us apart from all the animals and any scientific creation. Let me conclude with a quote from Notes: "It seems to me that the meaning of man's life consists in proving to himself every minute that he's a man and not a piano key."

Why I Support Proposition 8

The whole man/woman marriage debate has become quite exciting, even for non-California residents such like myself. I have never been one to shy away from action and so I've decided to throw my insight into the mix. Hopefully, this will be brief and to the point.

I've seen a number of different approaches to proposition 8. There are those who become angry at the whole homosexual movement. Their support of proposition 8 is simply because they are bigots. Others hate the supporters of proposition 8. They manifest their own bigotry by calling sincere and rational people bigots. Why can't we reason through this without hate? I like to consider myself a very tolerant person. I understand that by living in America, we need to be tolerant of other people's beliefs. After all, that is what makes our country great. Our country is engaged in a never-ending quest of balancing individual freedoms and limiting the infringement of others' rights. I strongly believe that homosexuality is wrong. But I try not to so in an arrogant, self-righteous, or intolerant manner. How can I believe in an amendment that would limit others' beliefs and still claim to be tolerant? Let me explain.

Lately I have been inundated with legal jargon. Honestly, I feel slightly less intelligent than I was a couple months ago. One thing I have taken away from my law school curriculum is that in some situations, you need to come up with a bright-line rule. This standard may not seem fair to some people, but is necessary to make things work in society. Establishing marriage as only between a man and a woman is a standard that we need to make. If you don't draw the line somewhere, you'll just have a big mess.

The basis for my support for proposition comes down to a matter of faith. Recently, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints affirmed its support of Proposition 8 and called on all members to help out in the cause. It has been recently reported that out of the $30M raised for the pro-prop8 movement, 40% has come from donations from the Mormon church.

I had mixed feelings when I first heard the church's statement. If you'll recall, in the late 19th century, Utah was a community that was prohibited from joining the United States because of its beliefs in plural marriage that it held. If we were being discriminated against back then for the government regulating our marriage practices, why should we enforce the government to regulate that today? Then I thought about how I know that God leads and directs this church. I don't know all the answers to how He leads and guides the affairs on earth. What was true back then may be different today. But what I do know is that God has affirmed that marriage is between a man and a woman.

There is a lot of excitement as to the implications of gay marriage in California. A lot of speculation abounds pertaining to the effects of Proposition 8 not passing. I don't know if children will be taught gay marriage in public schools or if churches will be sued if they don't perform gay marriages. I believe the effects of not passing Proposition 8 will be more detrimental than not to the state. Marriage needs to be a bright-line standard for our country.

A Mormon for Obama in New Hampshire

Last night, I attended an Obama speech in Concord, New Hampshire. Afterwards, I shook Barack Obama's hand (to be more precise, his right hand grasped my right hand). Here is a video that I took.
It was unreal to be so close to one of the most famous men in the world.

I think my favorite part of his speech was him going after McCain. He talked about how ridiculous it was that McCain all-of-the-sudden was an agent of change. Then he said, "They must think you're stupid." At that point a man in the back, with a gruff appearance responded, "We're not stupid!" Barack smoothly replied, "I know you're not stupid."

There were a lot of posters, some more unexpected than others. I saw one "Republicans for Obama" poster. I also saw older women holding posters "Hockey Moms for Obama." I thought about what kind of a poster I could have held up. Mormons for Obama?

Yes I am Mormon, LDS, a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and I support Barack Obama. I thought I'd enumerate why I like him.

1) He has family values. With a wonderful wife on his side, who adores him, and whom he adores, he also has 2 beautiful daughters. He loves them, it shows, and he is a good example to our country.

2) He is smart. First off, he attended a couple of the top universities in the country. After receiving his BA at Columbia University in political science with an emphasis in international relations, he proceeded to graduate from Harvard Law School Magna Cum Laude. This shows that he "gets" education - the value of it, the need for it. He understands that in a global economy, the United States needs to step up its education or it will fall behind. Many will say that the United States has done fine in the world without excelling in education. I don't believe this is sustainable. Education is something that I also have a passion for, and I believe that the hard work of a good education pays countless dividends.

3) He is smooth. I want someone to lead our country at home and abroad who articulates himself well, and who looks extremely comfortable doing it. That is Barack Obama. I don't know how he does it, but he is in his element when he is speaking to others. This makes someone look legitimate. When you have to rely on someone else writing a speech for you, and then looking awkward while delivering it, that does not lead to respectability. It makes you look like you're a puppet in the hands of someone else.

4) He is black. Sit back for a second and think about what this means for America. Look at how far we have come since the civil rights movement in the 1960s. Most likely, this will prove an important element with regards to foreign policy as we can approach and relate to countries that have inaccurately written us off as the country with the rich, white-male that oppresses everyone else.

5) He is not always decisive. The world has complicated problems and to tout that you can always act decisively and not blink is a weakness. One example is the recent Georgia/Russia fiasco. Did Georgia provoke Russia? Absolutely. It probably didn't deserve such strong military action, but to have someone immediately assume he knows the whole situation leads to bad foreign policy. Obama, with regards to the Iraq war, and Georgia most recently, has shown that he doesn't make hasty and potentially bad decisions. Will he make decisions? Yes, but they are much more careful and deliberated - something our country needs.

6) He inspires. When I listen to Barack speak, I honestly want to be a better person. Because of people like Barack, I want to be a better American. This is key. Without this element, you sometimes feel reluctant to do things your leaders tell you to do.

7) He has class. The McCain campaign has recently demonstrated that it is willing to say anything to get McCain elected. I can't believe some of the flat-out lies I have heard spread by Karl Rove/John McCain. Dishonesty makes me sick to my stomach and I have been impressed with Barack Obama for walking the high road. Lately he has been forced to use a little more exaggerating, but only because the American people have been believing the smear and slander. As these hilarious women were shouting next to me at the speech last night, "Shame on McCain!" If someone is going to be dishonest while campaigning (and if you don't believe me that McCain is being dishonest, go check out FactCheck.org an independent source that tracks truth in the political arena), it is likely that he will continue to be dishonest while in office. No, the American people want something different than that.

8) He is real. Barack Obama is himself. He's not trying to be more conservative than he is, he's not trying to be more qualified than he is. He is running as Barack Obama. He's honest about it too. He'll be the first to admit he made mistakes growing up. But it's not like he's trying to hide from it, pretending that isn't a part of who he is.

9) He has vision. Obama knows where America needs to be and much of that involves long-term strategies. From health care (which will inevitably cost America less as we focus more on preventive, rather than emergency room scenarios) to energy independence, Obama's policies in the long run is where America needs to be. We don't need the "Drill, baby drill" philosophy because in 10 years after we have drilled, we will still be dependent on a non-renewable source of energy. We need to invest in alternatives that include renewable energy and nuclear.

10) He understands the constitution. He taught constitution law at the University of Chicago for over 10 years. This means that he understands a document that was inspired and has served our country well for over 200 years. When I heard Republicans mock this sacred text at the Republican National convention, I realized that there are many people out there that don't understand something that sets our country apart from others: much of the beauty of our country is based on our government following the constitution. This means when it isn't convenient to do so [cough, Cheney], we still must abide by it.

11) He has done a lot of things. Barack Obama in Illinois was responsible for a bill that many thought was impossible. He got both parties involved and it was passed. I think that he will be able to get a lot of his ideas passed because he has shown that he can work well with people. He showed that early on when he was elected president of the Harvard Law Review. He also was a community organizer. I know he has been ridiculed for having this seemingly unimportant title on his resume, but let us remember that Jesus was also a community organizer. Pontius Pilate? He was a governor.

12) He likes people. Barack goes out of his way to talk to people and to make friends. He has a genuine interest in people. After graduating from law school at the top of his class and serving as president of the law review at Harvard, I am confident he could have worked anywhere he wanted. But he chose to work with disadvantaged people in Chicago. This not only shows that he will treat others that he deals with in other countries with the respect they deserve, he will also do everything in his power to help people in our own country.

13) He understands where he came from. Barack Obama was not given success on a silver platter. He has worked for it. He understands the principle of hard work and wants to give others the same opportunities.

14) He is open-minded. Obama is very open-minded to others' beliefs. He understands that we have differences, but we share so much more in common than we probably realize. I highly doubt that Obama is "the most liberal senator in the United States" as alleged by some National Journal study. It was flawed for a lot of reasons (including not voting for a third of the bills that year). How can you possibly go from being 16th most liberal to 1st in 2 years? No, Barack looks at both sides of the parties and recognizes similarities in all of us.

15) He is prepared to lead. He has been leading his whole life. At home growing up, at law school, in Chicago, even on the Senate floor he has shown remarkable poise to lead. No, he has not served in the military, but why does someone have to serve in the military to be prepared to lead? He has already generated more excitement in politics than anyone else in a long time.

16) He is a champion for the middle class. I heard straight from his lips yesterday, (and I have no reason to doubt this is included in his detailed plans as president) that contrary to what McCain purports, Obama will not raise taxes on 95% of taxpayers. When we hear of Democrats taxing the rich to give to the poor, I think it's a very common conservative argument to hold that isn't fair. The rich deserve their money because they worked hard for it. However, the richest people don't get taxed an equal percentage as others. Warren Buffet, the richest man in the world, has expressed that he would be willing to pay more in taxes. I think another train of conservative thought is that we don't want the government taking money from us. But I think a lot of my conservative friends don't realize that they aren't rich! They are middle class. My advice is to not worry about the government coming in and sticking it to you. Barack Obama is here to help.

In conclusion, there is a lot to like about Barack Obama, enough that I am fine putting my support behind the man. Our country will be better off with Obama at the helm.